I miss being an old married lady. But will settle for a slutty widow. The things I will do for a soccer dad. Especially one in close proximity. lol. But it’s like collecting Pokémon. My stripper was actually a closet soccer mom. I gotta have a pair ya know.

My Ideal Person Funny. Good sense of humor. Goofy dad joke sense of humor. Chivalrous. Dogs and Grandmas love you. What the old lady doesn’t know is how much you get off touching me under the table, teasing me in public and in front of others. Respectable, charming. A great date for work events. Even better fucking me hard and fast in parking lot right before. Smiling at me knowing my soaking wet panties got left behind in the car.