World's easiest quiz.
|
Posted:Apr 24, 2008 9:29 am
Last Updated:May 16, 2024 1:8 am
1617 Views
|
Passing requires only 4 correct answers
....a measly 40%.
1) How long did the Hundred Years War last?
2) Which country makes Panama hats?
3) From which animal do we get catgut?
4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
5) What is a camel's hair brush made of?
6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific is named after what animal?
7) What was King George VI's first name?
 What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
Bones question.
Who is buried in Grants tomb? 
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Joke of the Day
|
Posted:Apr 22, 2008 3:58 am
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2008 4:33 am
1702 Views
|
An English Grammar Lesson
Herb is getting along in years and finds that he is unable to perform sexually. He finally goes to his doctor, who tries a few things but nothing seems to work. So the doctor refers him to an American Indian medicine man.
The medicine man says, 'I can cure this.' That said, he throws a white powder into a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke.
Then he says, 'This is powerful medicine. You can only use it once a year. All you have to do is say '123' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!'
The guy then asks, 'What happens when it's over, and I don't want to continue?'
The medicine man replies: 'All you or your partner have to say is 1234, and it will go down. But be warned--it will not work again for another year!'
Harry rushes home, eager to try out his new powers and prowess. That night he is ready to surprise his wife, Sally. He showers, shaves, and puts on his most exotic shaving lotion.
He gets into bed, and lying next to her says, "123." He suddenly becomes more aroused than anytime in his life .. Just as the medicine man had promised.
Sally, who had been facing away, turns over and asks, "What did you say 123 for?"
And that, my friends, is why you should never end a sentence with a preposition. 
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
E-Mail Of The Day
|
Posted:Mar 30, 2008 5:48 am
Last Updated:Apr 10, 2008 8:16 pm
1803 Views
|
THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN.
Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa , half
discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe , well
developed and open to trade, especially for someone
with cash.
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain , very hot,
relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.
Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece , gently
aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain ,
with a glorious and all conquering past.
Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel , has been
through war and doesn't make the same mistakes
twice, takes care of business.
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada ,
self-preserving but open to meeting new people.
After 70, she becomes Tibet , wildly beautiful, with
a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages...only
those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for
spiritual knowledge visit there.
**********
THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN.
Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran , ruled by a dick
Have a nice day, and pleasant tomorrow.
|
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
E-Mail Of The Day
|
Posted:Mar 15, 2008 6:59 am
Last Updated:Mar 20, 2008 3:04 am
1648 Views
|
Einstein's (other) Theory
August 19 was Einstein's birthday. He would have been 128. Few people remember that the Nobel Prize winner married his cousin, Elsa Lowenthal, after his first marriage dissolved in 1919.
He stated that he was attracted to Elsa because she was well endowed. He postulated that if you are attracted to women with large breasts, the
attraction is even stronger if there is a DNA connection................
.......This came to be known as Einstein's Theory of "Relative Titty"
Oh, be quiet!! - I didn't write this, I just received it and wanted to share it with you.
Have good day, and a pleasant tomorrow.  
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Happy Birthday
|
Posted:Mar 8, 2008 6:30 am
Last Updated:Mar 15, 2008 7:04 am
1686 Views
|
BIRTHDAY REMINDER
This week we celebrate a special birthday!
Monica Lewinsky turned 34.
Can you believe it?
It seems like only yesterday she was crawling around the White House on her hands and knees, and putting everything in her mouth.
They grow up so fast, don't they?
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Growing old
|
Posted:Mar 4, 2008 4:15 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2008 4:17 am
1610 Views
|
I admit it, I'm not taking growing old very well.
I have more hair coming out of ears and nose than my head. Most of my friends are in their sixties, with two more joining that club this week. I be the baby of group at fifty-nine.
The other day I'm talking to Slim, and I said I'm 59 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're a couple of years older; how do you feel?
Slim says, I feel just like a newborn baby.
Really! Like a newborn baby?
Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.
You see, most of my friends, didn't take as good care of themselves as I did.
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
Living in a platonic relationship.
|
Posted:Feb 13, 2008 1:24 pm
Last Updated:May 8, 2008 5:50 am
1816 Views
|
Has anyone done it? Do you think you can have fun without being sexual involved? Here's my story, and I sticking to it.
I lived platonic-ly with two women when I lived in California. Both nice women. One said she was a witch. Her boy friend was on house arrest, and could spend some weekends with her. Weired smells and sounds use to come out of that room.
The other one was really pretty, and could have been attracted to her, but I knew better. She was having problems with her breast implants; one had become very hard at the top, and they had to go in again and fix it. I did get to see the before, but never got the chance to see the after.
They would throw house parties. Mostly couples, but I got to attend. One was a pedicure party. Since it was all couples but me; all the women were doing their boyfriend's or husbands feet, and I got to be the Ginnie pig for the woman who did the selling of the products and parties.
She had buckets to soak your feet in, with the fragrant crystals to soften the skin; and the clippers, scrapers, and creams. The witch, and I mean that in a good way, got a little carried away and started sucking her boyfriend's big toe like it was his cock. Having a woman pamper my feet, and watching a toe job was somewhat erotic.
One other time I had just taken a shower after and work and was resting naked in my room, the room mate with the implants knocked on the door and asked if I was decent? I said sure. And before she got all the way in the room, she stopped, and said," I mean do you have clothes on." We both got a laugh, and it was a standing joke from than on.
Do you think you could live in that kind of environment? So anyone have any stories to share with the class?
Happy Hump day. Don't say hump to a horny man.
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Super Tuesday
|
Posted:Feb 5, 2008 5:38 am
Last Updated:Jun 29, 2008 6:23 am
1829 Views
|
New Government Seal:
Official Announcement:
The federal government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you're actually being screwed!
It just doesn't get more accurate than that.
|
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
I had a dream.
|
Posted:Feb 1, 2008 7:50 am
Last Updated:Feb 11, 2008 3:30 pm
1716 Views
|
Seems I recall hearing or reading something about dreams that you remember occur about 30 seconds before you wake up. Well last I dreamt about an old girl friend. A little back ground. She is divorced.
She was a virgin when she got married at 29. She is the sister of a friend of mine, and I had a huge crush on her for 20 years.
When I moved back to Chicago from Sacramento in 1992, I didn't need any encouragement to seek a date. She was beautiful, great figure, great rack; good Italian girl. The only problem was sex, as she knew nothing what so ever about it, and she was kinda prudish.
In this dream, we were in some kitchen, not hers or mine, and she had shaved her pussy. I was going down on her, and now she had a little patch of hair on top. I'm thinking, did her current boyfriend teach her something about sex that I failed to do? After all shaving indicated some kind of sexual awaking. And than I woke up.
Reading too many shaving questions in the magazine? What does it mean?
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Lamb
|
Posted:Jan 29, 2008 12:10 pm
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2011 5:21 am
1718 Views
|
I just heard a commercial for a local Chicago restaurant advertising the finest Colorado Lamb. I eat most anything, but if a dish of lamb is in front of me, and if it hadn't been stated (Colorado Lamb) on the menu, I doubt if I would know the difference between Colorado, or anywhere else.
Has anyone put lamb to the test? Can you tell which state it came from?
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
Friday: Email of the Day
|
Posted:Jan 25, 2008 8:48 am
Last Updated:Jan 26, 2008 10:09 am
1735 Views
|
Catching wild pigs
There was a Chemistry professor in a large college that had some
exchange students in the class. One day while the class was in the lab
the Prof noticed one young man (exchange student) who kept rubbing his
back, and stretching as if his back hurt.
The professor asked the young man what was the matter. The student
told him he had a bullet lodged in his back. He had been shot while
fighting communists in his native country who were trying to overthrow
his country's government and install a new communist government.
In the midst of his story he looked at the professor and asked a
strange question. He asked, 'Do you know how to catch wild pigs?'
The professor thought it was a joke and asked for the punch line.
The young man said this was no joke. 'You catch wild pigs by finding a
suitable place in the woods and putting corn on the ground. The pigs find
it and begin to come everyday to eat the free corn. When they are used to
coming every day, you put a fence down one side of the place where they
are used to coming. When they get used to the fence, they begin to eat
the corn again and you put up another side of the fence. They get used to
that and start to eat again. You continue until you have all four sides
of the fence up with a gate in The last side. The pigs, who are used to
the free corn, start to come through the gate to eat, you slam the gate
on them and catch the whole herd.
Suddenly the wild pigs have lost their freedom. They run around and
around inside the fence, but they are caught. Soon they go back to eating
the free corn. They are so used to it that they have forgotten how to
forage in the woods for themselves, so they accept their captivity.
The young man then told the professor that is exactly what he sees
happening to America . The government keeps pushing us toward
socialism and keeps spreading the free corn out in the form of
programs such as supplemental income, tax credit for unearned income,
tobacco subsidies, dairy subsidies, payments not to plant crops (CRP),
welfare, medicine, drugs, etc. while we continually lose our freedoms -
just a little at a time.
One should always remember: There is no such thing as a free Lunch!
Also, a politician will never provide a service for you cheaper than you
can do it yourself.
Also, if you see that all of this wonderful government 'help' is a
problem confronting the future of democracy in America, you might want to
send this on to your friends. If you think the free ride is essential to
your way of life then you will probably delete this email, but God help
you when the gate slams shut!
In this "very important" election year, listen closely to what the candidates are promising you -
just maybe you will be able to tell who is about to slam the gate on America.
"A government big enough to give you everything you want, is big
enough to take away everything you have." - Thomas Jefferson
|
|
|
1
comment
|
|
|
|
A little Sunday fumor.
|
Posted:Jan 20, 2008 5:18 pm
Last Updated:Jan 23, 2008 8:44 am
1556 Views
|
A little girl asked her mother: How did the human race appear? The mother answered: God made Adam and Eve and they had and so was all mankind made.
Two days later she asks her father the same question.The father answered: Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race was developed. The confused girl returns to her mother and says: Mom', how is it possible that you told me that the human race was created by God and Papa says they were developed from monkeys.
The mother answers: Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about the origin of my side of the family while your father told you about his side. . .
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (wanttopamperyou2) use [blog wanttopamperyou2] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
|
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
211
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
261
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
31
|
|
